Unconnected

The Helpers knock at my door.
They are about 3 feet tall.
Sweet looks. Smiling.  Happy.
"We brought some food for you," they chirrup.
"We know you need food," they chorus together.

I let them in the door. They are so happy, so proud.
They are all over the room, chirp, chirp, here, chirp, chirp there.
The food is on the counter.  I'll look at it later.
Then, "It is time to go," they say together, looking sad, making sad faces, like puppets.
"Oh,
we are so sorry we must leave you now.  We know how much
you need us, our company, our food.  We leave you feeling
bad."  They're heads get bigger in front of me.


"So important we are in your life."
Their heads are quite a bit larger than their bodies.
It's hard to see they will be able to walk out of the house with such heavy
wide heads.

In fact, if they do any more "helping," they won't get out and I'll be stuck
with
The Helpers.

I walk to the door and open it, hoping I am subtle enough that they won't be offended.
 They do some reluctant steps, like the sadness, it is part of the game of the Helpers, but soon
they are gone.
_______________________________________________


It is hell being isolated, not feeling connected with anyone. 

Even when people are sincere and doing their best for me, there are times I don't see their kindnesses.
I get notions in  my head, concepts, ideas and can't see what is  When I see this in myself then I can accept and see this in another person.  There is someone who cannot connect with my good intentions right now. This person needs my understanding and connection in a way that works for him. It's about going deeper, things aren't always what they seem at first. It's about going deeper in me about what kindness, timing, truth and my intentions really are.  Is it my wish to change this person?

For now, there's resting in the river, not acting on anything.

Compassion is born from understanding. Understanding what? Suffering. And if you know how to suffer then you suffer much less. Second lesson: Compassion should be directed to yourself first. Our civilization has a tendency to want to run away from ourselves. Thich Nhat Hanh